What To Do When You Run Out of Texts

Sex In Self-Driving Cars?

Updated 3 weeks ago Peter McCarthy
Advantage Self-Driving Cars: You Will Be Able To Have Sex In Them
Advantage Self-Driving Cars: You Will Be Able To Have Sex In Them
Photo Credit: Steve Jurvetson in Wikipedia

Just when you trained yourself to swerve out of the way of drivers texting their way down the street, self-driving cars are opening up new possibilities for escaping the drudgery of the road, among them - having sex while artificial intelligence handles the road.

The Sensible Alternative?

Let's say you've got no choice but to drive up I-95 from DC to New York, escaping the tedium of your job as a congressman to beg for money from Wall Street bankers. It should take four hours or so.

Of course, it doesn't. You can spend an hour just inching along between purple lines, getting to the toll booths for the Holland Tunnel.

And let's say you've texted everyone you know that isn't looking for a favor, and you're between Netflix CDs. Or say, neither situation exists. You're just a little bored.

Would you pass the time having sex in your self-driving car?

Let's assume you have compatible and equally liberal minded companionship watching the world go by from the passenger seat.

A new novel...

What's Happening in the Other Lane?

For a Twitter poll reported on in an article in The Daily Dot, 81% of respondents said they would give in to temptation. Anonymously.

Twitter poll takers probably skew young, and a scientific poll might get a more conservative response. But if you cut the "Yes!" votes in half, 40% still want to have sex in their self-driving cars as the New York skyline looms ever so slowly closer.

(Note: You're milage may vary, depending on who's riding from DC with you.)

Science Rewards Us With Boundless Possibilities

It's not as strange as it seems.

According the article, there are concept cars that now allow the front seats to be turned around so that they face seats in the back. You can play chess or power down a shared pizza, both of which probably take up more of your time than sex.

Most self-driving cars in concept stages now require a driver to be present as a safety feature in case something goes wrong. There will come a time when that's no longer true and cars, like airplanes, are safer without humans at the controls.

Black Cat Christmas

And then...

Those who now text while driving in spite of all the warnings will probably do whatever comes naturally. Self-driving cars may become the status symbol of choice for the young and reckless.

Still, experts predict that self-driving cars will decrease (automobile) accidents by 80%, and Nobel Prize winning novelist Saul Bellow in Herzog argued that having sex is an act of good citizenship.

But not necessarily while speeding along I-95 at 70 miles an hour as the Capital's dome recedes in your rear view mirror.

Keep your eyes on the road. For now. Keep a cool bottle of water handy.

Cat art from Roosevelt Island...

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